I have sisters and nieces. I have female friends. I grew up with some of them and I know what it means to grow up in a society that sometimes, or most times, has something against them; that they can’t live a full life. Or they can live a full life, but it has to be at the expense of sacrificing something. My female friends told me stories about their experiences and I wish I could offer them words to alleviate their emotions. But I’m a boy, a guy, a man, and even though that really doesn’t deny me from offering them the words, I believe it sinks better when it comes from a gender who has experienced what they’ve gone through, or a gender that at least understands what it means to go through what they’ve gone through.
So here, today, in honour of International Day of the Girl Child, I have invited four remarkable and illustrious women to write letters to a girl child. These letters are heartfelt messages to their daughters, younger sisters, and every young girl everywhere who is navigating (or will navigate) through life. I hope these letters reach them and that they take the messages to heart.
Hauwa Shaffii Nuhu – Storyteller
Dear Girl,
It is possible to nurse your dreams into life even in the most unfavourable conditions. I realise how difficult it can be to cling to them, to not water them down to accommodate the strain and challenges that come with being young and woman in the world. There will be times when you will want to quit. There will be times when you will want to settle for less. There will even be times when you will question the validity and relevance of your aspirations. But in the end, you will be glad to have persevered – if you persevere.
As you go along in your journey, do not relegate friendships with your girls. Friendship is essential to living. It is as critical to your soul as food is to the body. It will nourish your mind and shape the trajectory of your life. Take time to nurture them. Avoid meaningless connections and relationships. As harmless as they seem, they chip away at the grandeur of your dreams and the depth of your mind, and one day, you may wake up to find that you have become too comfortable with mediocrity and the ordinary.
We have not yet arrived at a version of the world where our gender is no longer a disadvantage in certain quarters, but when we do arrive there, I hope to see you there.
— Hauwa.
Alma Asinobi – Travel Content Creator
Hey Girl,
The world is all yours. The possibilities? Endless. Step out of your comfort zone often – that’s where all the growth is. Take risks, and allow yourself to fall. Fail fast, learn early, try everything. Do the things that feel right. Fall in love. Take chances. Feel everything. You can’t please everyone, so don’t spend valuable time trying. Be true to yourself. Give to people who can’t repay you. Seek help. Bury shame. Be open-minded, but firm with your boundaries. Don’t forget to extend the same grace to yourself as you do to others. Find your zone of genius and own it. Figure out what sets your soul on fire, then spend the rest of your life pursuing it relentlessly. 6 and 9 are the same and different, depending on where you’re standing, so entertain other perspectives, but decide where you stand and hold firmly onto your convictions. Stand for something or you’ll fall for everything. Say yes often. Say no even more often. Your voice matters. Speak up. Don’t let anyone tell you you can’t do anything – not even yourself. When you walk into a room, hold your head high, even if your knees are knocking. Your voice matters. You matter. The world is yours for the taking, and you can have it all.
— Alma.
Bukunmi Oluwasina – Actress
Dear Brave Girl,
Today, I want to tell you how precious, powerful, and capable you are. You are the future leader, innovator, and change-maker the world needs. Your laughter, curiosity and creativity light up the world. Don’t let anyone dim your sparkle. You have the right to dream big, to learn, to grow, and to thrive.
My dearest, I know sometimes you worry. And at times life places you where you feel the need to be the one to look after people and situations you are not responsible for. As you grow, I hope you know and always remember that those burdens were never yours to carry. Those school fees were never yours to work for. Those younger ones were never yours to cater for. So, the hurts and blames that follow every stage, please let them not be yours to carry. Do not let them define you as you grow into the emotionally strong woman everything would shape you to be. Always remember, you also deserve to be loved and cared for.
Do you know the smartest and most valuable person in the world? It is the person you see when you look in the mirror. So never compare yourself to anyone else. However, know that beauty is not what you see in that mirror. Beauty is a virtue beyond physical. What you do to make others and yourself better is what makes you beautiful. Don’t let societal norms or expectations hold you back. Break barriers, challenge stereotypes, and forge your path.
Remember, your voice, feelings and opinions matter. So, speak up and demand to be heard. As you grow, and your body changes, know that those delicate parts are not meant to be a play object accessible to anyone, nor are they meant to be exposed for attention, attraction or favours. They are just like flowers. They wither as we grow. Unlike having a brilliant mind. Because what will attract you to everyone in a room, is what you know, that others don’t. So, my love, do not stop learning. And know that with this, you can be anything good you desire. And, you have the power to make a positive change. Keep shining, brave girl. Your future is bright.
With love, admiration and solidarity,
— Bukunmi.
Amanda Uzoagba – Entertainment Lawyer
My Precious Girl,
On this special day, I want to share something close to my heart with you. Being a woman in this century is a beautiful journey filled with endless possibilities and moments of vulnerability. Embrace both. There is strength in allowing yourself to be soft, to feel deeply, and to know it’s okay to not have all the answers right away. As you walk your path, remember that you come from a lineage of women who have walked bravely before you, and yet, you are uniquely your own.
As I’ve built my path in the entertainment world, I’ve learned that it’s not just about being seen or heard, but about making sure your values and vision shape the world around you. There will be times when you need to stand firm, and times when your creativity and heart will guide you. In moments of vulnerability, know it’s okay. You don’t have to be strong all the time. It’s through those tender moments that you’ll find your greatest strength.
At some point, you’ll need a community of women who will uplift and support you. They’ll be your safety net when you fall, and your loudest cheerleaders when you rise. Surround yourself with those who understand your dreams and fears, and who will push you to keep going when the road gets tough.
The world is vast and filled with opportunities. In business, in music, in film, or in anything you choose—you can be a creator, a leader, a force. Never let anyone dim your light, and always remember, my darling, that you are capable of so much more than you can imagine. Whether you choose to be in the industry I’ve grown to love or a path entirely your own, I will always be proud of you, and more importantly, I know you will leave a mark on this world.
With all my love,
— Mom.
